


Pizza, pizza (my Kaladin for your pizza)

by TheMalhamBird



Category: Stormlight Archive - Brandon Sanderson
Genre: Fluff, Not To Be Taken Too Seriously, Other, Pizza, Suggestive Themes, squabbles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-28
Updated: 2015-09-28
Packaged: 2018-04-23 21:14:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 763
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4892476
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheMalhamBird/pseuds/TheMalhamBird
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>From the prompt: Imagine Person A being held hostage by C unless B forks over the last slice of pizza they have.</p><p>( http://otpprompts.tumblr.com/ )</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pizza, pizza (my Kaladin for your pizza)

“Anyone going to eat this?” Adolin asked, stretching his hand out to take the last slice of pizza from the box.

“ _Yes.”_

Quick as a flash, Shallan dived for the pizza, grabbing it and stuffing it in her mouth.

“Aw come on,” Adolin complained. “You don’t even _like_ pepperoni.”

“Yeah well.” Shallan took a second bite, stretching back in her chair. “Kal had the last slice of my ham and pineapple.”

“I offered that to you!” Kaladin protested. “Three times. You said you were full and I could have it. The third time, you said if I didn’t get on with eating it you’d shove it down my throat yourself.”

“That was then.”

Kaladin rolled his eyes and returned to sewing the buttons back on his waitcoat. Adolin, however frowned.

 _“I_ don’t get the last slice of _my_ pizza because _Kaladin_ ate the last slice of _yours,”_ he complained.”How is that remotely fair?”

Shallan shrugged. “It isn’t. Deal with it.”

Adolin pursed his lips, looking between Kaladin and Shallan and back to Kaladin again. “Fine,” he said, before standing up, striding over to the armchair where Kaladin was sitting, and – breathing in a little stormlight- picking Kaladin up and tossing him over his shoulder.

“Adolin!” Kaladin yelled, dropping the waistcoat. Buttons scattered across the floor. Shallan lowered the pizza.

“Where are you going?” she asked, eyes narrowing dangerously.

Adolin grinned. “Bedroom.”

“How about no?”

“Why not?”

“Because! You got Kal to yourself all last night, I was stuck with you all by myself the night before. We agreed I got Kal to myself all night tonight.”

Adolin grinned. “Well, I’ll trade you...”

“No.” Shallan shook her head. “Uh-uh, no way. I’m not rewarding bad behaviour.” She took another huge bite of the pizza.

“Neither am I.” Adolin said. “So we come to an impass. You have the pizza, I get Kal. You give me the pizza, you can have Kal back.”

“If either of you trade me for a slice of pizza, I’m moving back in to the barracks with Bridge Four.” Kaladin threatened.

“Sure,” Adolin said, patting Kaladin absentmindedly on the rear. He would have been worried, but the fact Kaladin was holding quite still, had even gripped the back of Adolin’s knee with one hand to keep himself steady, indicated that he was perfectly fine where he was. From the snort Shallan gave, she’d come to the same conclusion.

“Pizza for Kal,” she repeated. “What makes you think I won’t get pizza _and_ Kal?”

“Logic,” Adolin reasoned. “If  you come get Kal off me, you have to put the pizza down, at which point I drop Captain Long-Legs here, he squashes you flat and I take the pizza. If you continue shoving pizza in to your mouth, I just walk off with Kal and take him somewhere you won’t find us.”

“People are going to notice you carrying the Lord Windrunner over your shoulder, Adolin, I think you’ll be pretty easy to find.”

“Just give me the pizza.”

“No.”

 _“Please_ ” Adolin pulled his best puppy dog eyes expression. “I’m _hungry.”_

“Go eat Kaladin’s-“

“Alright that’s enough,” Kaladin interrupted. “Shall, give Adolin the pizza.”

Shallan’s eyes opened wide, looking hurt. “Why are you taking his side?”

“I’m not taking sides. But you don’t like pepperoni and I don’t like where that remark was going.”

“Of course,” Shallan grinned wickedly. “I forgot that _you_ were the one who-hey that’s cheating!” she whined, as Kaladin’s body suddenly steamed with stormlight and the pizza slice was lashed from her hand.

“Whatever.” Kaladin kicked Adolin gently in the shin with his toe. “You can put me down, now.”

Adolin lowered him gently to the ground, and kissed his nose. “Thanks.”

“For what?” Kaladin asked.

Adolin frowned. “You just rescued the pizza for me.”

“Uh, no.” Kaladin said. “I told, you, I’m not taking sides.” He tossed the pizza to the side, sending it straight out the open window.

Shallan and Adolin stared at him, mouths open. Kaladin shrugged. “Don’t try to trade me for pizza,” he said.

Shallan found her voice first.

“Oh you are _so_ getting punished for that,” she threatened. “Feel like giving me a hand?” she added to Adolin. “I’m happy to share.”

Kaladin looked incredulous. “You couldn’t have said that about the pizza?”

She threw him a dirty look. “Well, we might have done, but someone threw it out the window.”

Kaladin rolled his eyes. “Whatever. I’m going to check on my men before bed.”

“Take your time,” Adolin said, a glint in his eye. “Shallan and I need to plan...”

“

 


End file.
